This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
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