i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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