I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
