whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
She said her name was "party"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
