You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
