Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?

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(410): View more from Maryland

I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.

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(480): View more from Arizona

I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way

(1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

you don't.

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(204): View more from Manitoba

they're like a gay fantastic four

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(541): View more from Oregon

get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers

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(937): View more from Ohio

Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.

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