I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
