I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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