the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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