margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
