and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
