she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
