i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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