real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
