at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize