Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
These tits shall not be calmed
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