ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
im holly from the hills drunk
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
