there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
