Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I think your dad took our porno
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
