you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize