I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
