we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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