wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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