It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
