that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
