New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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