IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Acid is not a monday night drug
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
