Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
