check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Randomize
