Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize