Will you blow on my dice?
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
