Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
