Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
