I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
