My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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