I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
We need to rekindle our bromance
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Randomize
