Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
