We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
