i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
We need to get me chipped asap
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize