my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
