Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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