She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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