You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
