i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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