She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
sex in a hospital.. check
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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