Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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