It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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