You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
