Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
