She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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