i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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