is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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